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The Computer
Psalm |
The Lord
is my Operating System, I shall not hang. He makes me to boot
normally without errors. He loads my
routing table with cool links; he restored my path. He
routed me to the server of righteousness, for His domain
sake. Even though I browse hackers’
sites, I will fear no attack, for he is my Firewall. Thy
antivirus and Intrusion Prevention
System, they comfort me. Thou preparest a link before me
in the presence of time-outs; thou connected my links
with fiber optics. Surely solid
connection and replies shall follow me all the period of my
pings. And I shall telnet from the
server of the Lord for ever and ever. Amen. |
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The
Beer Prayer: |
Our
lager, Which art in Barrels, Hallowed be thy drink, Thy will
be drunk (I will be drunk), At home as in the tavern. Give us
this day our foaming head,
 And forgive us our spillage's, As
we forgive those who spill against us And lead us not into
incarceration but deliver us from hangovers for thine is the
beer, the bitter and the lager for ever and ever.
Barmen. |
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The
Bible Research: |
Bible
researcher interviewed Hausa, Yoruba and Ibo folks to know what
they would rather change in the bible if they were given the
chance. The Hausa man said: "Walahi, the adulteress Jesus asked
to go should have been stoned fa!" The Ibo man replied: "NNA, I
can't understand why Judas returned the money after selling
Jesus. In short, he is not a good business man." The Yoruba man
retorted: Jesus should have waited just one more day before
raising Lazarus from the dead. We had already paid for the ASO -EBI.
At least he should have allowed us enjoy the OWAMBE before
performing his miracle |
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Food 4
Tot
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If your
father is a poor man,
it is your fate but,
if your father-in-law is a poor man,
it's your stupidity.
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I was born intelligent -
education ruined me.
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Practice makes perfect.....
But nobody's perfect......
so why practice?
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If it's true that we are here to help others,
then what exactly are the others here for?
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Since light travels faster than sound,
people appear bright until you hear them speak.
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How come "abbreviated" is such a long word?
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Money is not everything.
There's Mastercard & Visa.
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Behind every successful man, there is a woman
And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.
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Every man should marry.
After all, happiness is not the only thing in
life.
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The wise never marry.
and when they marry they become otherwise.
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Success is a relative term.
It brings so many relatives.
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Never put off the work till tomorrow
what you can put off today.
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"Your future depends on your dreams"
So go to sleep
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There should be a better way to start a day
Than waking up every morning
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"Hard work never killed anybody"
But why take the risk
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"Work fascinates me"
I can look at it for hours
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God made relatives;
Thank God we can choose our friends.
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The more you learn, the more you know,
The more you know, the more you forget
The more you forget, the less you know
So.. why learn.
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A bus station is where a bus stops.
A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk,
I have a work station....
what more can I say........
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Press Up |
A drunk was passing by when he saw a man doing press up
in the park, the drunk said to the man
” Excuse me I think someone has stolen your girl friend” |
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